01 nov 2002
by Nanci Olesen
It's been over a week. I want to say next
that our hearts are broken. I still want
to say that. There was a very dynamic man
here in Minnesota who was a part of our
everyday life. And now he's gone. His wife,
who his son David said was "EVERYTHING"
is gone too. And his daughter, three of
his staff, and two pilots. Now it is turning
into some kind of legend in the way that
climactic events do.
I don't want it to turn into a legend.
But I'm not sure I can deal with the raw
pain either. We walk around and tell one
another where we were when we heard that
Paul Wellstone had died in a plane crash.
For me it was the paper plate aisle of my
local Target store. I heard "Paul Wellstone"
something or other on the intercom. I smiled,
thinking how cool Paul Wellstone was that
he would just bop into the Lake Street Target
in the middle of the afternoon. But that
wasn't the case. He was dead. And so were
his wife and his daughter and his aides
and his pilots. I remember paying for my
items while I was crying. I remember the
store clerk telling me I had forgotten one
of my bags. I remember picking up the bag
and running out of the store to my car radio.
Then I am home crying with my husband in
front of the television. Then I am with
my children and my mom and some dear friends
and we are at the anti-war march in St.
Paul. Then I am at church, where each scripture
reading was about Paul Wellstone instead
of Jesus.
Then I am in the living room reading the
paper, seeing pictures of the crash. Then
I am driving to the service feeding my children
ham sandwiches at 4 o'clock in the afternoon
and we are entering Williams Arena and we
are standing and sitting and clapping and
singing and crying for five hours straight.
Then I am trick or treating and everyone
has a Wellstone sign with candles by it.
And even though I know he is dead now I
am in complete disbelief as I see those
signs and those candles.
Then I am helping my daughter get her DAY
OF THE DEAD celebration ready for school
and she has chosen Sheila Wellstone as her
person to honor and I am cutting her picture
out of the paper to put in an envelope and
I am sobbing.
I don't know if I want to mention the strange
feelings of the day after the service when
the Republicans cried foul for the Democrats
being emotional and wanting to win in the
name of Paul. And the way that suddenly
we were on a long cynical exploitive ride.
I don't know if I want to mention that people
think that maybe the plane crash was not
an accident or the way that my friend said
that it's always the good guys that it happens
to.
I just want to make it go away. And I can't.
But in a way it is, because it's fading
back into the background as if it really
DID happen. And now we vote and wait and
cry and roll up our sleeves again and get
to work.
—Nanci Olesen
producer and host, MOMbo: 1990-2007 |
